[Special note: Couple-premarital counseling is cash-pay only]
Everything on this page presumes you already saw the introductory stuff about my couples counseling work on the home page. If you didn’t, it would probably be a good idea to check it out and then come back here.
I am a Gottman-informed relationship counselor. This means that what I do is based on the research and clinical work of Drs. John and Julie Gottman.
If you search around the internet for Gottman, you’ll see that Gottman is basically the gold standard for excellence in couples counseling (or one of just a few, anyway). I encourage you to read more about the Gottman Method so you will understand what to expect when you come to see me.
Does Couple Counseling Work?
Results can never be guaranteed in couple counseling, because they depend on too many factors to count. A partial list includes:
- How long the problem has been going on
- How long one partner has been begging the other partner to take the problem seriously
- How volatile/violent the arguments have been
- The personality of each partner and their willingness to accept responsibility and do the work
- Whether there has been an affair and how deceitful the cheating spouse was
- Each person’s ability to forgive and desire to grow
- Other stressors on the relationship, such as work, child-rearing, finances, illness, etc.
Most couples who are willing to make the investment and do the work can at least learn to live more peacefully together. Some couples will go on to become happier than they ever imagined they could be, and this even includes relationships where there has been betrayal.
Views on divorce
Divorce is sometimes the lesser of two undesirable states, the other being for couples to continue victimizing one another.
Should that difficult day come when you decide to call it quits, I will help you move forward as amicably as possible, minimize conflict, and decide how to talk to your children and co-parent as best you can. I am a pro-marriage counselor, but not all marriages can or should be saved.
My job is to make sure that whatever couples decide to do, they are both aware of the cost of their choice. Divorce is rarely the panacea it may seem to be. And repairing a broken relationship can take a long time, a lot of hard work, and specific results are never guaranteed.